Sunday, March 25, 2012, 10:46 PM
Today I write about Marriage.
yes, dear friend, I am capable of such kind of thought.=)
It’s a thought encouraged by a facebook post of a former colleague about him getting engaged. And then eventually getting married. (Thank you facebook for your updates of our friends’ major milestones in life, keep it up!!) The former colleague has the physique of a high school student. You know those kids in Hollywood movies who always get bullied in school? - Not really tall, thin, goofy smile, gullible but angelic face, elicits the usual description of fresh grads from company seniors: parang pinabili lang ng suka ng nanay niya nang nakakurbata tapos di na nahanap yung daan pabalik, yun, nagtrabaho na! It does not seem right. I cannot imagine him being a dad because he looks like a kid himself. I cannot imagine him on his honeymoon night (go ahead cringe with me and accuse me of entertaining such lurid thoughts, Oh God make me sleep!!!), he is such a baby to even go on a honeymoon or even just hold a girl’s hand. But thinness and lack of height, not even age, are NOT enough measures of one’s readiness in marriage. I myself am not prepared for one. Marriage requires selflessness and maturity – virtues I do not have and have not even started working on. Marriage requires one a sense of completion of himself – because how can “two become one” when one of the two is fragmented into many parts. Two Christmases ago, my father, having lost track of his children’s ages, asked me to remind him how old I am. I told him I was 23 years old. He chuckled and remarked that when my mother was my age, she already had two kids, my brother and me. Well, I have one kid which I have a great deal of trouble handling – myself.
Let’s see three years from now. Or maybe four. Or five. Or ten. I really don’t know. But should that day happen, the day when I finally find the courage to say I do, to wake up in the morning and find another human being on my bed, to spend the rest of my life with him who has been singled out by destiny and by the Divine to be with me, to be mine and for me to be his - amidst the “bigness” of this earth and the multitude of human beings who roam this planet, to bear beautiful children (and smart and funny and sexy like their mommy!!) and be responsible to impress on them the beauty of life… I just pray that it be worth the wait. And please Lord, help me make me, worth the wait.
For now, let’s settle with simply being in luurvveee.
Monday , March 26, 2012, 10:41 PM
Today I write about Freedom.
And how it is such and intimidating topic.
And how it is best to live it than to write it.
And how freedom makes me want to do the crazy thing.